Night of the Amazingly Strange Younow
by idiot-inator
Summary: Phil entertains the viewers on livestream while Dan is sick and sleeping in Phil's bed. Can be read as romantic phan, domestic phan or platonic phan


**I don't own them! They are real people!**

Phil sets up his Younow account for his weekly episode with one thing different. There is a lump in his bed. Dan has been knocked out with cold medicine and is currently asleep in Phil's bed. He has pulled off his shirt and jeans, his head under blankets and exposing his Crash Bandicoot boxers. Dan hasn't stirred in hours and Phil really doesn't want to wake him. So, he settles onto the edge of the bed where the camera doesn't show Dan, and he starts up the show in a whispering voice.

"Hey, guys. Dan's asleep from a cold, so tonight's video will be a little shorter and a lot quieter. Hi, wallyworldtime. Hi, hushpuppy. Hi, Anna Banana. Hi, badtooninkey. I like to mash potatoes with my toes. Well, that's a weird thing to start off with. I see you've been stalking me like true phans. Yeah, I remember telling the world that on one of my first videos. That I deleted."

Although his voice remains the same, there is a twinkle in his eyes, warning his viewers that he doesn't want to talk about that anymore. The person who brought up the topic leaves the viewing area and more pile in. Phil greets them.

"Hi, waterbottlemanic. Hi, Li'l Kitty. Hi, Stephanie Michelin." He pauses to grab a carrot from off screen. "Ever wonder what a vegetable thinks about? I bet they're like, at first ooh my home is so cold. But then they get to leave home like how children go to University. Only the vegetable goes from the Earthy ground to a basket. And they meet a lot of other vegetables from other patches and stuff. Then they get carried inside to get washed. And it gets into some sort of like adult picture with all their…." His eyes widen as he pushes away the carrot. "And I'll just leave the rest up to your imagination."

He notices the feeds going wild over his overactive imagination being carried away from him. Phil laughs a little, awkwardly, and thanks his fans for sticking around. They remind him just how weird he is and that is why they love him. Because he isn't afraid to just be himself. Feeling better, he continues on with Storytime.

"I've told you about the iron before right? Thinking it was a phone? Yeah. Well here's another iron story. I went down to the hardware store with Dan because one of the knobs broke off one of our kitchen drawers, so we went to replace it. The guy we found who works there took us to the appliances and handed us an iron. We asked what it was for and he was,"

Phil pauses to delve into a broken southern Swedish accent. "This here's for 'aught you needin' to fix them knobs in your pants."

He switches back to his. "I was standing there all confused and I looked helplessly to Dan, who wasn't even paying attention. But then he put his magazine aside and asked the man why we needed the iron. And then came his embarrassing answer."

Again, to the broken voice. "This be here you need so you don't get dodgy and knock off your knobs in yer pants when you two playing naked tonsil hockey in the eatin' area." Phil stops, mouth agape in horror.

He's back to his own tired voice now. "Yeah. That guy thought Dan and I were, uh, having sex in the kitchen and we bent our, uh, knobs. If you get my meaning. So, yeah... We, uh, we bought the iron and we found the drawer knobs. Bought them, came home and fixed our kitchen."

He smiles sheepishly to the camera before reading off the wild messages. "Were you and Dan actually having sex and just choose not to say?"

He lets out a short laugh. "No, we weren't. We were arguing over making something for dinner."

Another scroll. "Werewolf Enigma says, 'Naked tonsil hockey? That's a new one'."

Phil nods. "Yeah, I knew tonsil hockey was making out, so I put two and two together. Not like that!"

He reads one more. "My grandma irons her diapers."

He just stares for a moment. "Okay, well, thanks for sharing that fascinating tidbit with the Internet." Phil rummages through the chat with a yawn. "QuestingLlamas asks 'how do I kiss if my boyfriend has never kissed either?' I'll show you."

Phil reaches on the floor, grabbing his plushie snake Timmy. He fits the sports bra that Dan wore as for Becky persona around the snake, tying it off in back with a rubber band. He then commences to show his viewers how to make out by doing so with Timmy. Dan makes a moaning sound and Phil drops the snake, jolting his attention over. He accidentally kicks the edge of his laptop, so it focuses on the crumpled, sick lump on the other side of Phil's mattress.

"C'ming to bed, Philly?"

The black-haired boy crawls over, attempting to shake the younger boy awake. After a few minutes, a longer yawn escapes Phil's throat. He succeeds in getting Dan to roll over onto his back – only for Phil to succumb to sleep and drop over his lap.

[OMG! Screenshot! – SnowflakeLion, 4:12pm]

[Allergic! To! The cuteness! – 805headache, 4:23pm]

[That is sooooo domestic! – Mister Gray Digit, 4:30pm]

[Hey, guys? – Cosmo Moxie, 4:37pm]

[They're so cute together! – Spooky_Fido_Trouble, 4:44pm]

[They look like they haven't slept in ages… - EvilFelicia, 4:49pm]

[If anyone says their not together now, I will scream. – Culver's Not Cheese, 4:57pm]

[PHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNN! – scaryfangirl, 4:59pm]

At five, the livestream is automatically turned off and the boys continue obliviously slumbering. At five-thirty, Dan subconsciously runs his hand through Phil's hair, causing the older boy to snuggle in closer. At six, Phil is completely lying atop Dan, with both their arms wrapped around one another protectively. At seven, Dan awakes. He is a little afraid since he has no clue what's happened.

He sees he is in Phil's room with Phil lying on him. He notices he isn't wearing a shirt, and then notices what Phil is wearing. Dan sees his flatmate's laptop is positioned for a Younow and is grateful that it is turned off. He squirms a little, but Phil's reflexive instincts push him down to be trapped between the bed and his best friend. Dan is comfortable and lies back down, arms wrapping around Phil.

Phil awakes at nine. He realizes he must have finally gotten the sleep he's been deprived of and smiles. Then he sees that his pillow is breathing, and he sits up quickly, shrugging off the wanting arms. Dan's eyes pop open. They aren't alarmed, so Phil quickly gathers he must've already noticed.

"If you already woke up, why didn't you get up?"

A blush creeps over his face. "You didn't want me to. You pushed me back down."

After a short pause and Dan looking expectant, Phil finally speaks. "If that's you searching for an apology, I'm not giving you one."

"You're not going to apologize for pushing me back?"

"No. I obviously wanted you to stay and be my pillow. And you stayed. And you were my pillow."

Dan sighs in contentment. "You keep me comfortable."

Phil nods, giving Dan a light squeeze and losing his eyes again. "You keep me safe."


End file.
